1) “Jay-Z would have been here, but he’s building a summer house in Cuba.”
2) “Trump’s here? Have the Secret Service shoot to kill!”
3) “Make sure all the Bushes are seated as far from the bar as possible. And keep the waitresses away from their table.”
4) “What type of wine goes with humiliation?”
5) “Tina Fey and Sarah Palin are making out in the bathroom!”
6) “When should we tell the Secret Service we’re replacing their suits with non-functioning, but stylish Iron Man armor?”
7) “Gwyneth Paltrow just showed up – nude.”
8) “I heard Disney bought the White House.”
9) “Is this a good time to reveal our new breathing tax?”
10) “What can we pull off while everyone’s distracted by this crap?”
Image via Wikipedia
The TLC network has left its mark on the modern television age through such shows as the entertaining Cake Boss and the dreadful and chilling Toddlers and Tiaras. It has also allowed itself to be manipulated by a new master of the modern political machine.
A staggering 3.2 million viewers a week tuned in for Sarah Palin’s Alaska to see the state’s most talked-about resident shoot defenseless wildlife and make Kate Gosselin almost cry.
Now it appears the timer has run out on the newest reality television experiment. The network hasn’t announced a second season and Palin is being unusually silent about her reality tv future.
Palin and her father Chuck took more than a few shots, (Get it, they’re gun nuts!) at Kate Gosselin, chuckling over clips of Kate whining about being cold and wet on her brief Alaskan adventure.
“It was a bit of a country mouse, city mouse kind of thing,” said Sarah, (She’s going to need a qualified speech writer if she does set her sights on the White House!). “Ya gotta give it the old college try, though.” Palin added, “I never heard the kids complain; they were innocent, sweet, curious spirits.” Chuck added, “She was out of her element, poor lady.”
I can’t properly convey how strange it sounds when a Palin pities a Gosselin; it’s like George W. Bush criticizing..anyone. Political pundits have watched Palin’s show closely, speculating a second season would mean she isn’t serious about a run for higher office.
Whether the show returns or not is irrelevant, it’s purpose has been fulfilled. Sarah Palin’s Alaska has been the most expensive, successful and longest televised political campaign ad in history.