In this day and age, it’s safe to say people are desperate for strong, dynamic leadership to guide them to a new age of prosperity.
If one Toronto political leader has his way, that new age will be funded in the most unlikely of ways.
“Picture this. You’ve just finished an important dinner at harbour 60 with business associates and you want to get back to Mississauga. You head down into a privately built tunnel with mahogany walls and the smoothest asphalt known to mankind. It will be the world’s first full-service luxury tunnel.”
The tunnel in question is but one component of Councillor Doug Ford of Etobicoke North‘s master plan to combat the city of Toronto’s projected $774 million budget deficit. While his big brother the mayor was busy pissing off the city’s entire gay population by skipping their Pride festivities last week, Councillor Ford was unveiling his plans for the future.
Never mind thinking outside the box, Doug Ford prefers to think “off the reservation”, as they say!
“Now let’s say you get a flat tire. How about a Hooters tow truck that serves wings? Or if you happen to be a successful entrepreneur who’s grown the economy and expanded the tax base, then you could take a private off-ramp right to your front door.”
A Hooters tow truck that serves wings? Will the Hooters girls driving the truck be licensed mechanics as well?
While I support Councillor Ford’s zeal and uniqueness (his office is decorated to resemble a sports bar and he drinks a custom blend of Coke with double the syrup!), I don’t think the road to a new Camelot should detour to a private tunnel.
But what do I know? I don’t even like Hooters wings.
- Ford’s family defends decision to skip Pride Parade (cbc.ca)
- Doug Ford: Riding shotgun in the Fordmobile (theglobeandmail.com)