I’d love to know exactly who is responsible for unleashing the horror that is the affliction known as the headache on mankind. My money is on Chris Brown, I mean Satan.
But I digress.
As you’ve no doubt guessed, I am suffering from a ridiculously powerful headache. But my devotion to my readers is more powerful than any headache – so far – so here we go.
A headache is defined as:
1. A pain in the head.
2. Informal Something, such as a problem, that causes annoyance or trouble.
3. Something that keeps The Hook from blogging.
Or does it?
1) A seemingly uncontrollable urge to drill a hole in your head. To let the pain pour out… along with your brain, of course.
2) The desire to vomit. Is there anything worse than throwing up?
3) Other people that actually have the nerve to speak to you. Leave me be; you’ll live longer…. Maybe.
4) A crippling pain that starts at the back of your head and sloooowly spreads through your whole body. I’m 43 now, I don’t need any more aches or pains.
5) A state of desperation that compels you to pray to any deity capable of easing your suffering. If this keeps up, I’ll start praying to the entity that gave Justin Bieber and the Kardashians their success, I swear!
6) Dizzy spells. I feel like a washing machine agitator right now. Or those old men I always see in Walmart. The ones who couldn’t score a scooter. The poor devils are always turning left, then right, then left, then - you get the idea.
7) An impaired state of being. Why oh why, did I start a blog post about headaches while I have a headache?
8) Blurred vision. I’m currently writing three posts… simultaneously.
9) They always strike when you’re working. Always. My two days off? Headache-free, of course.
10) The power of aspirin is an old wives tale. Seriously, I’m dying here!
This concludes our time together, folks. Now if you’ll excuse me. I’m going to look for a quiet, dark corner to die in….
Sometimes #2 can make it feel better, at least temporarily. I know, I’ve been hungover and welcomed those brief moments of relief immediately after my stomach was evacuated.
You’re right, but I still hate it!
God I hate those headaches! I end up wanting to bang my head on a wall repeatedly because it will feel good to stop.
I hear you!
Is it just a really bad headache or is a migraine? I suffer from migraines and they are not to be played with. Mine start over my right eye and make me want to gouge my eye out of its socket. It travels all the way to the back of my neck on the right side and I’m nauseous, too. I keep two bags of frozen peas in the freezer for migraines–one for my eye and one for my neck. They mold nicely to the shape of one’s anatomy. You might want to try this trick. I highly recommend frozen peas.
I feel your pain. I suffer from cluster headakes. Number 11, sensitivity to light!
Good one!
2) Worse than vomiting? NOT being able to vomit when you want to! Trust me, been there…
I believe you!
Hope you feel better…
Thanks! I’m feeling much better now,,,
I suggest any one (or all) of the following: A big glass of cool water, some Vicks under your nose, a bath or shower, liquid b-vitamins, a nap, or Aleve. Those are my go-to anti-headache remedies. I usually try the water first because a lot of my headaches are due to dehydration. If all those things fail I probably need to get the prescription for my glasses updated – but I digress. I hope your head feels better soon.
I’m good now, but it was touch-and-go for awhile…
Dry heaves are far worse than vomitting. Drill to the head– yup.
I hope you feel better!
Thanks!
Headaches suck. Of course, toothaches REALLY suck, but headaches aren’t that great either.
Definitely not!
That marching in like a lion thing? Hope it’s better now….wait – time to shift daylight savings? Sounds like another headache coming on…not good to mess with biological clock and sleep time for those sensitive beings…(and we know Hook is sensitive – look at his human circus blog posts)
The Hook is Ultra-sensitive!
Nice to see you back – and quite by accident too! No’s 4 and 9 were my worst.
I hear you!
I believe that watching someone vomit is worst than vomiting yourself. And I just read an article yesterday that stated sex is the best cure for a bad headache. Wish I still had the article – I’d give you the link and you could show Mrs. Hook!
Not a bad idea, Diane…
I like the way you think!
Sorry for your pain!
Thanks, old friend!