I hate them with every fiber of my being.
Ironic, isn’t it?
Bullies are filled with self-loathing and a lack of respect for others and yet, the very thought of someone – of any gender or age – using their strength or power to oppress others sickens me to the core.
We’ve all been bullied at some point; the wounds run deep and can have disastrous consequences. How many young people have taken their own lives in the last few years because they felt completely and utterly alone when faced with the horrors of bullying?
Making their deaths even more tragic is the presence of numerous support systems that keep failing these lost souls.
- Teachers who look the other way. Their courage and compassion shrunken by time and cynicism.
- Principals who refuse to confront parents of bullies. Even though studies have shown bullies are bred rather than self-invented.
- Peers. Understandably, they’re too afraid of becoming the next victim to step forward, but adults need to remind these kids there is strength in numbers.
- Police Officers. You may be laughing, but when we were kids who did our parents tell us to turn to if we got into trouble? That’s right.
There is a lot of attention being paid to this subject right now, as recent suicides have drawn the public and lawmakers into the fray. Everyone wants to help, and so articles are written, news reports are filmed, and both victims and former bullies are speaking out.
But to what end?
Has anything really changed in the last few decades? Bullies are still terrorizing their victims while so many others look the other way. I’ll tell what has changed, though; the method by which bullies strike and their gender. Females have turned to bullying in alarming numbers, and they’re using the most effective social networking method of the last decade to reach the widest audience possible.
Facebook.
Mark Zuckerberg’s creation has become a weapon of mass destruction in the hands of countless male and female bullies. Most parents refuse to monitor their children’s use of this platform, so bullies are free to write whatever they like about anyone.
I don’t know what else to say; I feel exhausted just writing these words that I know will ultimately change nothing. My little blog is adrift on an ocean of rants, viral videos and celebrity gossip websites. People often say, “If I can reach just one person, I’ll have made a difference.”
One person is not nearly enough.
It’s going to take a society of angry, fed-up, heartsick people to reach inward and stop producing generation after generation of frightened children so filled with self-loathing they lash out at their peers instead of their tormenters.
WE HAVE TO STOP LOOKING THE OTHER WAY AND START FACING THE EPIDEMIC OF BULLYING HEAD-ON.
Related articles
- What are the signs of a “bully-victim”? (education.com)
- Bullying (thepaolite.wordpress.com)
- Low Self-Esteem and Bullying: How are they related? (education.com)
I couldn’t agree more. My daughter was bullied at school and when she finally admitted to us what was going on we stepped in. We were lucky, her principal took a hard line, the boys parents were contacted. I personally spoke to the boy and so did her father. It worked for a while, but without constant reprogramming bullies tend to come back.
The sad reality is that my daughter and to “earn street cred” for it to finally stop. She had to confront her bully and she punched her and knocked her down (my daughter took jiujitsu classes).
Personal empowerment is the key in my opinion. We had my daughter in martial arts starting at age 4 and we always told her that her mental health was more important to us than whether or not she got suspended from school. That we cared more about her ability to respect herself and feel safe. We offered her home-schooling. She chose to finish out the year and when she felt like she couldn’t take it anymore, she responded. Wrong as it might seem to some, when she got into that fight with her bully … we took her out to celebrate … to reinforce that it’s NEVER wrong to protect yourself.
I couldn’t agree more, Gillian! My daughter takes karate, although I hope she won’t need it, you never know…
I totally agree with you. Bullying must stop, and we must take a stand. Looking the other way encourages bullies, we need to strike when the iron is hot. I don’t believe it’s going to change, but we can send positive messages out. Facebook is the leader in masked bullying. Great post!
Thanks, Jennifer. I have several friends who requested I jump into the fray, as it were, and this post was the result. Thanks for commenting.
So few people take it seriously. I think many dismiss it as something “natural” to growing up. Well, just because its a commonly-shared misery doesn’t make it acceptable, or somehow less wrong. So I am with you on this one!
Glad to have you onboard.